WHERE I AM COMING FROM...

        Allow me to introduce myself, where I am coming from and my point of view. I was born, this time, in the U.S.A., State of Virginia (where the first Europeans landed on this continent and set up colonies to begin America; birthplace of the most U.S. presidents; major landing and slave market place for millions of kidnapped people from Africa; the first and only State of modern times to elect an African-American Governor, etc.), in the city of Petersburg (where the siege took place that resulted in the end of The Civil War), in the year 1943 (two years before the official end of World War II), on October 25^th (the cusp of Scorpio, 8^th house in the zodiac).

        My archetypes range from the Native American Shaman/Sorcerer/Person of knowledge to the inner Australian Aborigine to the African Allmuseri [Charles Johnson MIDDLE PASSAGE book] to the Eastern Vishnu—“The Preserver, Lord of the Waters”, and on into the European and Western “Son of Wands” depicted in the Mother Peace tarot deck, and described in the Mother Peace book as follows;

“The Son of Wands represents the Horned God of ancient shamanistic religion and contemporary witchcraft (derived from old English word wicca, which referred to healing).  Unlike the Son of Swords, this Son is not cut off from the Mother of the group, but dancing at the center of it.  He represents ‘pre-macho’ masculinity, the archetypal positive male principle whose elements are light and fire.  He is ‘untamed’ as Starhawk says of the Horned God.  ‘But untamed feelings are very different from enacted violence.’  Instead of going off to seek individual glory, he remains within the orbit of the Goddess; his power is always directed toward the service of life.  His sexuality though wild is also ‘gentle and tame’.  Traditionally the lover of the Great Mother, the Son delights, amuses and entertains.  He celebrates life in much the same way as his sister, the Daughter of Wands.

The Son, like the sun glowing behind him, represents the directed warmth of summer sunshine, ego expressing itself through a dance of life.  The I Ching describes the sun as 'the gentle, the penetrating’, and in this way this son represents the initiating force.  In his hands he holds a rattle and a prayer stick, wands that will focus the energy in sacred ways and keep it clean and light.

Ruled by Mercury, the Son also represents thought and the positive power of the mind fired by intuition and joy.  Not all Eros, he also represents Logos, the power of the mind.  ‘To witchcraft there is no opposition between the two.’  The God of the Witches is the untamed male presence in a world that predates patriarchal sex roles and control by males.  He represents for all of us, women as well as men, the untamed part of us that will ‘never be domesticated, that refuse to be compromised, diluted, made safe, molded or tampered with.’

A model of male power that is free from father-son rivalry or oedipal conflicts, the Horned God has no father.

He represents high energy, a penetrating mind and cheerful success in the world.”

Prior to beginning my second year on this planet, this time, we moved to the city of Hopewell, which is five miles from Petersburg, with the Fort Lee Army Base in between. The city was named after one of the three small exploratory ships that sailed up the James River in search of the most satisfactory sight for the first Europeans to settle after their trip across the Atlantic ocean in the three larger ships that you likely have had to remember the names of.  The captain of the exploratory party was Sir Christopher Newport. Captain Newport left some of the people in the exploratory party at the place now known as Jamestown and continued his exploration up the James River. He landed this time in the area now known as the City Point Historic District (site of General Grant’s headquarters during the last eight months of the Civil War) of the City of Hopewell where he was greeted by the Appomattuck tribe of Native Americans led by a female “queen” who “royally intertained” him.  He decided this was the place to settle and went back down river to get the rest of his people, whereupon he found they complained that they were too exhausted after their long arduous trip across the Atlantic, were satisfied enough with where they were, and the rest is the history of the First Settlers you likely have been taught.

(Notes: [1] The Hopewell Treaty may have been the first made and broken with the native Americans. [2] In 1765 the Revolutionary Way hero, Peter Francisco - “Washington’s one man army”, was put ashore at Old City Point whose early community was primarily engaged in shipping.  [3] In 1913 the Dupont Company bought some land in Hopewell and started a small dynamite plant that brought more than 40,000 people to Hopewell until that plant was shut down after the Armistice (W.W.I, 1914-18).  Dupont then “helped” Hopewell become the “Chemical Capital of the South” by “attracting” other industries, which included Hummel-Ross, Tubize, Allied Corporation, Hercules Inc., Continental Forest Industries, Inc., Firestone Synthetic Fibers Co., Stamscott, etc.: several of which have moved on.  Hopewell - 10 square miles is presently (1991) struggling to clean up from most recently being ranked number 16 in American, of the most polluted cities, with the population still in decline.  With the shift in the Western World - which includes Hopewell - from industrial based economy to ‘light and clean’ services, the city of Hopewell is, in conjunction with the National Parks Department and the Federal Bureau of Historical registry, in the process of developing, promoting and attracting tourist trade.)

My immediate bloodline is African, Cherokee - Native American, White/Caucasoid, and so on.  My biological mother, Nettie, and one of my aunts, Ada, say that I had blue eyes (now brown as well as my skin) when I was a baby. And my mother says that one of my uncles, Leverse, asked (when he first saw me as a baby) her father, Arthur Ford, “Where did Nettie get this white baby?”  My mother also says, the mid-wife who delivered me said I was born with a veil over my eyes.  My mother did not ask her what the veil looked like.  The person passed out of this life before I could ask her, what the veil looked like.

        The earliest thoughts I remember having, as a child of between 3 and 6 years, while sitting on our front steps looking up at the sun were, “If God made the angels, the earth, the stars, people and everything else, then who made God and who made whoever made God…?” I would later be taught beginning with the Baptist religion, that there were “some things that people are not supposed to know” and therefore “some questions that should not be asked.” 

        I read in Stephen W. Hawking’s book, A BRIEF HISTORY OF TIME, that on the occasion of his and a group of World renowned experts on cosmology attending a conference at the Vatican, which was organized by the Jesuits to, supposedly, advise the Catholic Church on cosmology -- “At the end of the conference the participants were granted an audience with the Pope.  He told us that it was all right to study the evolution of the Universe after the big bang, but that we should not inquire into the big bang itself because that was the moment of Creation and therefore the work of God.” Huh? 

        So, we have some of the most advanced thinkers on the planet Earth today, being told by the leader of the World’s largest, most powerful and influential religious organization, essentially the same thing that a poor little uneducated “Negro” boy-child was told in the segregated South half a century ago. This ludicrous attempt to limit what questions people are ‘permitted’ to ask and think about is all the more ridiculous, at best, when we consider the huge intellectual and technological advances that have been made in the last 50 years. Those advances include “smart bombs” and the computer named Deep Thought, capable of playing Grand Master level chess games. Deep Thought lost the match against the World’s Chess Champion, Gary Kasparov, – followed, some months to a couple of years later by the computer, Deep Blue, which ‘won’ when Kasparov quit in frustration.  We have also witnessed, in the last twenty years, the official acceptance by the Catholic Church, over three hundred years after the presentation of the facts, that Kepler, Copernicus and Galileo were right - the Earth is not the center of the Universe or of our planetary system.

        The latest is that that Pope John Paul on Sunday March 12, 2000 “Apologized to God, women, homosexuals, ‘blacks’, and the Jewish people…” for all the sins and atrocities of the leaders and people of the Catholic Church through all the ages”. Huh? Did they just recently become aware of these “…sins and atrocities…”, just in time for the 2000 year anniversary of the Catholic Church, and days before the pope’s historic visit to Israel? What about all the treasures and artifacts that are in the miles and miles of tunnels under Vatican city – all of which were plundered and stolen during the 2000 years of  the existence of the Catholic Church? And what about all the millions of people tortured, murdered, enslaved and/or cultures entirely wiped out? Maybe most important is what can and is he and the current leaders of the Catholic Church doing and intend to do in practical and tangible reality to compensate?

        How about, for a start, donating one half of the Catholic Church’s wealth to the impoverished “Third World” countries’ descendants of the millions of people who were tortured, murdered, had their most valuable financial assets and artifacts plundered and stolen, and so on – to substantiate their words with deeds? And immediately allowing archeologist, anthropologist, researchers, and other professionals and scientist, to access, photograph, and so on, all of the goodies that they’re hiding in those tunnels under Vatican City? In my opinion, all of that stuff truly belongs to all of us of this earth’s human species, and future generations, as we are all descendants of all of those who have gone before us. Even they must know the truth of this since they’ve apologized for how they came to possess it all, in the first place.

        Otherwise, if the rest of this earth’s human population is to follow the example of this world’s largest religious membership organization, then all criminals – murders, thieves and such, should, after they’ve accomplished their goal, be allowed to keep whatever they’ve gained from their criminal deeds, apologize and that’s that. Let’s just “forgive”—ignore and/or forget it ever happened. I’m betting that the leaders of the Catholic Church will continue to have as their priority, trying to accumulate more wealth, influence and power over Earth’s human population to their bitter end. But, in any event, the truth can only be hidden, repressed, suppressed, denied and all that, for a finite amount of time, and can not be ignored away or changed by papal bull.

I’ve heard that it is written somewhere in the current version of the “Christian” Bible that “The meek shall inherit the Earth”. Deceased former Harvard University professor and renowned Consciousness Frontiers person Dr. Timothy Leary was quoted as having said that “The meek shall inherit the Earth when the strong no longer want it”.

This species does not have time for any of us individuals to indulge in procrastination or waiting to change our ways of thinking and behaving -- say for another 300 years for “official” acknowledgement and permission – or for any other reason. We need to consider and take seriously the overwhelming and mounting evidence and facts that are available. These include a four page paper titled “WORLD SCIENTIST WARNING TO HUMANITY” [Web address is www.worldtrans.org/whole/warning.html] released on November 18, 1992 by a group of 1,575 of this world’s top scientist, among whom are 99 Nobel Science Prize winners. The truth is, most likely, as they informed, “No more than a few decades remain before the chance to avert the threats we now confront will be lost and the prospects for humanity immeasurably diminished. Human beings and the natural world are on a collision course. Human activities inflict harsh and often irreversible damage on the environment and on critical resources. If not checked, many of our current practices put at serious risk the future that we wish for human society and the plants and animal kingdoms, and may so alter the living world that it will be unable to sustain life in the manner that we know. Fundamental changes are urgent if we are to avoid the collision our present course will bring about”. 

I have been able to trace the tremendously awesome and persistent efforts by the misguided powers that be and have been in control of this earth for, at least, the last few hundred thousand years to pre-biblical Mesopotamia (it’s “written in stone”). To my satisfaction, via THE GODS OF EDEN by William Bramley [www.magnet.ch/serendipity/eden/tgoedesc.html] and on into Zecharia Sitchin’s [www.crystalinks.com/sitchin.html] books, and other experiences/real-I-zations, I have accessed conscious awareness back to before “The Beginning” – the Kundalini experience of “Samadhi without seed”.

Those beings that, at any and all cost, have distorted, stifled, repressed, suppressed and hidden, full disclosure and access to All, of known spiritual/fourth dimensional - invisible to most - universal and cosmic facts/truths must be exposed, to start with. The imbalance of  availability, access to and distribution of this earth’s resources caused by the misguided/corrupted beings, motivated by the most profound and deeply rooted defiance and insecurities, who have insisted on maintaining an artificial superior spiritual, mental and material status, at any cost, has to be corrected. Their justification has been and is an adaptable and changeable series of contrived religious doctrines, distorted truths and deceptive theories, judicial laws that primarily protect the wealthy, or whatever. These have included, “Most people can not handle knowing all of the Truth” - although this has never been proven. They need to be seen and understood for who and what they are.

         The net effect, of erroneously believing or pretending that some individual, religion or organization is responsible for everyone else’s “salvation” and/or is "the only way”, is the spiritual, psychological and physiological constipation [blocked energy and matter] causing the current World wide epidemic of consciousness crisis, mental confusion, physiological dis-ease and pervasive environmental pollution, pushing the Earth-life survival envelope to maximum capacity, with an Earth-life species extinction rate estimated to be approximately 100 extinction’s per day.

My biological mother and grandparents used to insist that I should be thankful for having something to eat, eat all of the food on my plate at meals and think about “all those hungry people over seas” who would be more than happy to have whatever I had on my plate, and sometimes did not want to eat.  I decided that when I grew up I wanted to do something to help feed the hungry people of the World.  This idea I now think about as my intention to continue to do what I can to help stimulate and motivate as many people as I may reach to feed themselves. With the priority emphasis on feeding Truths (known but unknown) into the conscious awareness of the individual’s minds, with the use of studies, meditations, communications, prayers, clear thinking and DOING THE BEST YOU CAN with whatever the circumstances and situations YOU have to deal with.  Which in turn will nourish all of this earth’s people of three-dimensional atomic body(s) existence, and more.

Although I graduated from the all “Negro” Carter G. Woodson High School - this was before the time of popularly demanded “Black History” courses – no one at the school ever told me who Carter G. Woodson was. There was no mention of the fact that he was an important historian who wrote the classic, The Miseducation of the Negro, originated Black History Month, et cetera - and, for sure, there was no emphasis on the person or his works.

The fact is that in the nascent spirit of 2001, at the beginning of  the “New Age” of the next millenium, it is rather apparent to some of us that what we have had is The Miseducation of the People on the Planet Earth, historically. Misdirecting us to the current situation involving the critical question of whether or not this earth’s human population will annihilate our species and all of the others that we take out before and with us within the next 100 or so years. Precipitated by the indoctrination of most people with the fundamental belief of not only the inevitability, but also the desireability and necessity of wars to apocalypse, promoted historically, by the misguided/corrupted secret societies and predominate institutionalized hierarchical religions on Earth, and so on.

Given these facts, the current predicament of the people of Earth was certainly predictable.  The “bottom line” is that too many of the people who have existed on Earth - and do exist - have been influenced and persuaded to accept, believe in and be extremely diligent about the priorities of conquering, and killing each other (and time). This earth’s human population has been continuously taught, influenced and persuaded to hate other people/“the enemy”, along with having fun “killing time”, our other human relatives (and everything else that goes before and with us) by the contrived perpetuation of wars.  English philosopher Thomas Hobbes wrote, “The condition of man (people) . . . is a condition of war, of everyone against everyone.”

Is there any wonder that so many people, especially in the younger generation, have so little respect for self or others in an era where the President, George Bush, of the “greatest nation on Earth” and “The World’s only Super-power” says about the President of another nation, publicly, that “We’re going to kick his ass”?  And, the ‘great General’, Colin Powell was reported to have gone back to the high school that he graduated from in an economically poor area of Brooklyn, New York and told the students “When anyone causes a problem for you, make it someone else problem”.

There is no mystery about why there is so little confidence in any individual’s or institution’s credibility when we are being bombarded with a steady stream of  “news” about religious fraud, governmental/political fraud, business fraud, academic fraud, scientific fraud, police fraud, sports fraud, and so on. [Oxford Dictionary definition of fraud: “criminal deception, use of false representation to gain unfair advantage; dishonest artifice or trick (pious ~, deception intended to benefit those deceived, and especially to strengthen religious belief); person or thing not fulfilling expectation or description; (arch) deceitfulness.”]

The people who are most assured of being punished (from economic deprivation to intimidation and murder), in this psychological/mental environment of intense stress and dis-ease, are the “whistle blowers”, i.e., people who tell the Truth about wrong doings. 

        Who are the most well known, popular and influential modern idols/hero-ines? An athlete, movie star, Rock and/or Rap entertainer, “The richest man on Earth” – Huh? Certainly not any spiritual leader or consciousness frontiers person with a priority of assisting the best possible “harvesting of souls” or evolution to “HEAVEN” as well as the best possible life here now for each and every individual. Or, at least, to help as many as possible to the next highest dimension, density, frequency, plane, level or whatever term YOU prefer to refer to where we go from here -- when our guaranteed time comes to change from this life form.  Certainly not any with a spiritual/cosmic truth priority like some of  the judicial law breakers, mavericks, “trouble” making, consciousness pioneer types of individuals personified in Jesus, The Christ, Buddha, Joan of Arc, Harriet Tubman, Zora Neal Hurston, Dr. Chancellor Williams, Rahsaan Roland Kirk, Peter Gersten and many others who exemplify(ed) this priority -- rather than the priority of personal fame and/or financial fortune, and trying to “die with the most toys” as the symbolic measure of the most desirable and greatest accomplishment attainable for any person during this Earth life.    

Deceased Professor Albert Einstein is quoted as having said that “Imagination is more important than knowledge”. So, try to imagine this. What if, somehow, the genuine priority, substantiated by the use (different from ab-use) of the World’s resources, were to shift to - as Ida B. Wells said to some incarcerated ex-“legal” slaves expressing a desire to die rather than suffer confinement and abuse - “Concern yourselves with living fully, not dying” . . . and unnecessary killing? This is quite different from the traditional “Machiavellian” version of  “saying one thing and doing another” which has evolved into what is now accepted as, or believed to be “human nature”, and used to one degree or another by too many, simply confused or downright deceitful, people, i.e., “Doublespeak”; the current contrived and sophisticated technique of the deceptive use of words.  Have you ever heard about the, not so distant past when “A man was as good as his word” and “A man’s word was his bond.”?

After all, at some time in the future, even The Sun will expend all of it’s energy and “die” (change form).  Death does not need any help. The idea is to individually, and as a species, DO THE BEST WE CAN to LIVE as well as we can with whatever we have to work and play with—which includes however much time any of us have. 

recently passed (3/90) out of this life, why she left him, but she thinks he may have been told by others or 

figured it out.

years later, lived next door to my grandfather’s house where we lived after my mother left Edward, 

basically ignored (and worst) my sister and I, his "step children", after we moved into a house with him.

over protective (always afraid of my being hurt playing with the other boys or "roughhousing", etc.), over 

affectionate (too much "my little Sweetie Pie", and stuff), over dependent on me for someone to tell her 

personal troubles to, unrealistic in teaching us that if we, just "Treat people right…they will treat you 

right". Nevertheless, I grew up thinking and behaving with those teachings as my strongest influences, 

and as a results was confused and disappointed a lot in my early adult years, to put it mildly.

left one month after graduating from high school at seventeen years old, into the Navy, and had the idea 

that I would shed all, or at least most, of my fear and confusion sometime shortly after I became 

twenty-one years old. It didn’t quite work out that way, as various encounters and experiences 

continue to highlighted for me.

experience", analyzing my own thinking and behavior, and studying the basics of everything I can get to 

and comprehend, from religions to philosophy, martial arts, writing composition, music, meditation, 

sales and marketing, business management, politics, yoga, film making, television production,

chemistry, mythology, poetry, movement/dance, medicine and surgery, war and street life...

troubles—as well as my best friend having been my sister, Veronica Montez—instilled in me a deep 

empathy with the opposite sex and attuned me to feeling comfortable communicating with females on 

any subject, which some women have told me is a rare quality in men that they have known. Yaaaahh!!!

emotionally and physically strong enough to avoid or get out of any relationship that I determine to be 

destructively out of balance. I am not "married" mainly because I do not believe in paper marriages 

sanctioned by a man made system which would dictate the "legal" requirements, obligations, rights

mental, spiritual and physical personal relationships, except for one brief, business necessity, paper 

one. My related principles are expressed in the lyrics of one of the songs that I have composed and 

recorded as ". . .one and one in a union of one . . . without trust, how can our lives be any fun?" I

or sadism. I do not like to be hurt or hurting anyone else, although I don’t have any psychological, 

physical, spiritual or ethical barriers to defending myself with as much force as necessary.

treat people with respect, consideration, and understanding. With the knowledge that this is how I relate 

to others from my heart and mind, I give myself the benefit of the doubt in questionable encounters, 

followed up by inner review when I find quiet space and appropriate time.

"The creative artist needs to retain healthy naiveté to remain open to creative ideas, wherever they may 

come from." This works for me. And by choice, I would rather be more opened than closed, restricted, 

narrow and shallow. Besides, I am blessed with the recuperative capacity of the scorpion, and I am now 

pretty good at sensing and determining when someone is trying to take unfair advantage, extricating 

myself from his or her direct influence and/or avoiding those types.

school (school of life that is), ain’t broke too many rules, don’t run around with no mobs, got myself a 

little job…I don’t bother to weep and moan - anyway, I’m… grown"—chronologically that is, and most 

importantly, experienced, knowledgeable, mature and responsible.

insignificant but it’s crucial that you do it". Mahatma Gandhi Or, in other words, if I (or YOU) fail to do 

whatever my (or YOUR) individual part is in this life, it won’t get done, because no one can do the life 

work for someone else .

and came clearly to the surface of my consciousness in my third decade here on this planet. That is, 

"Why do people think what we think and the way that we think, and behave the ways that we do?" Over 

some period of time I began to realize that most people don’t seem to know why they think what they 

think. They just turn on the recorded message from their memory bank and out comes, "…taught/told 

me" and/or "it says it in…" and or "that’s the way things are". When probed for details about this the 

range of emotions in reactions spread across the spectrum from stupefaction to defensiveness to 

offensiveness to hostility.

can I know I have My Mind if I can’t change My Mind? And use it to KNOW for Myself—without following 

so and so or having to accept, on ‘blind faith’, what

The All Mighty God-Dess Creator of all things in Heaven and on Earth (with several hundred 

billion suns/stars in our Milky Way galaxy, several hundred billion galaxies - and try to imagine 

how many planets - in our known Universe), transcendent—Omnipresent, Omnipotent and 

Omniscient would reduce itself to being "repented"/sorry (Genesis 6:6), cruel, wrathful, jealous, 

vengeful and the other petty, negative attributes reflecting a profound lack of "self esteem" and the 

characteristics and traits of a nitwit. Those characteristics and traits were and are projected on it 

(God-Dess) by the people who have espoused those things and projected that insidious image, 

historically?

responsibility for My Eternal Spirit and Soul, how and what I think—and so on. It became clear to me that 

my responsibility for having ‘my mind’ and using it to know for myself ultimately can not be escaped by 

following so and so and trying to force Myself to believe on ‘blind faith’ what so and so interprets for Me. 

Because, as far as The Truth is concerned, the analogy of "not knowing your (My) ass from a hole in the 

ground" would apply. These thoughts were followed by the real-I-zation that my choice is clear, as Jack 

Johnson said "I got my chance and I’m gonna take my chance".

dazzle, hocus pocus, confusion, deception and fear—will be the most liberating and gratifying 

experience you can ever have. The hardest part is getting started, which you have already done.

maximus), since your ass is indirectly linked to your Heart and on to your Mind, stay on the path at YOUR 

tempo and YOU inevitability will arrive at Knowing for YOUrself that YOU are functioning at the level of 

Your Heart and Mind in harmony with the Truth. SeeJ ?

years that some to most people believed it did because a few misguided "officials’ declared and 

insisted it did. And no other Truth will try to change to suit what anyone believes for whatever reason. 

Nor will intimidating, torturing or killing the bearers of the Truth, change the Truth. Oh yeah, and

doomed abuse of power [THE PRINCE by Nicolo del Machiavelli], which is the lesson of history.

organizations have existed long enough to prove this, by changing what they had previously claimed to 

be the Truth. And, despite the fact that many bearers of the Truth down through history have been 

isolated, intimidated or tortured into silence and killed, the Truth keeps rising to the surface,

apparently, is no escaping the Truth even with the most fervent false beliefs supported by the most 

elaborate ceremonies, rituals, guarded secrets, and military might sustained for thousands of years. A 

prime example is the Egyptian Pharaohs who had their human body remains mummified because they 

believed they were going to get physical body transport to The World of Immortality at some future time. 

What we know now is that a few of their mummified physical bodies are on display in some show 

places. And, people taking the treasures buried with their remains have destroyed some. I’ve read that 

some have even been ground into power and used as pigmentation in paints.

laws, attainment of power, fame and fortune such as Lee Atwater and Armand Hammer one is then 

confronted with the finite limitations of such endeavors. Which brings one back to where one started, 

i.e., face to face with the Truth and priority of expanding individual conscious awareness to

acknowledgment of and respect for the power and influence of the ‘invisible’, to most, ‘known but 

unknown’ realms of beyond this world origin, which requires re-cognition, acceptance and practice of 

it’s Divine principles. In this school of life on Earth we have the opportunity to manifest these Divine

are to attain and sustain the initial sought after personal "salvation" and satisfaction of accomplishments 

that last—and that one can, "Take it with YOU."

anyone else. As a matter of fact, I think we All owe anyone, who has gone before us and followed an 

erroneous path that they thought and believed was right, our love, respectful and gratitude for showing 

us what not to do. They paid the personal price and we need not repeat their mistakes if we are wise 

enough.

odds and involving suffering human body and material world sacrifices that most of us will not encounter 

at those levels of intensity—their experiences can help us to find the courage to do what is best for  

ourselves and future generations of Life on Earth. Our choice seems to me to be to "believe" and 

behave like "we are hopeless sinners" (self fulfilling prophesy) or to pursue, attain and sustain more and 

more of our individual and species maximum potential for consciousness enlightenment and 

consciousness evolution.

absolute honesty/Truth. When we meet the "angel" at the "gate to Heaven" representing our pure 

God-Dess consciousness, there can only be absolute Truth, as we can not "pull the wool" over our own 

eyes.

BARKING UP THE WRONG TREE

    As I see it, the fundamental problem at the root of the major surface problems (illiteracy, crime, poverty, racism, greed, psychological and physiological dis-ease, environmental degradation…) of life on the planet Earth, is that too many people have been and still are influenced (involuntarily and voluntarily) to direct their attentions away from individually responsible decisions and actions.  And instead, have been persuaded and steered to diversions and hopelessly “barking up the wrong tree(s)”, trying to find genuine self worth, peace of mind, purpose for living and the like.

In other words, consider this: It is clear to me that the surface problems, that threaten to extinguish human existence on Earth, can not be solved by following politicians, bosses of corporations and businesses, the leaders and hierarchy of religious institutions and such. Or, by worshipping athletes, movie and/or television stars or other celebrities.  Most people who have existed (in “traditionally recorded history”), and most of those now incarnate, have been trying these ways through out the course of “history”, and people and life on Earth are now in deeper do-do than ever before.

Two, recent and current (1993), glaring, examples are: [1] The man who claims to have been the single final decision maker on the matter of initiating the Desert Storm War, George Bush (against the advice of six or seven former United States Secretaries of Defense, and of other professional war people), and his governmental administration, which includes, quite possibly the most sophisticated public relations and information control people and network ever, have so far effectively obscured the most important issue concerning the so called victory, which is: Of what good, that is likely to last, did all that killing, destroying and expenditure of economic resources do?  [2] Shows business stardom, and sports in particular, are not the most important professions that a person can be a part of (despite the fact that the earnings amounts sharply contradict this).  I am athletic and a musician and I know what great fun active and vicarious participation can be, as ‘just plain long fun’ and a wonderful way to spend some time. But . . . the unbridled and obsessive consumption and influence of sports and other forms of entertainment in this society, and world, is sick.  What about the priority of INNER-TAINMENT? Or as the renowned and legendary sportscaster, Red Barber —now deceased— stated in one of his Friday morning commentaries on National Public Radio, when asked about the amounts of money involved in sports: 

“I keep hearing, through various media sources, about all the homeless and hungry people in America, the lack of money for health care, education and other things, and then I hear how much money is centered around sports these days, and it just seems to me that things have gotten out of whack.”

The cost of a major league baseball franchise today (1993) is ninety five million dollars ($95,000,000) plus another thirty million ($30,000,000) in order to “PLAY BALL!”, for a total of one hundred and twenty million dollars ($120,000,000) to start a new major league baseball franchise, and people with deep enough pockets for this, are waiting in line, impeded from rushing in, only by the fact that the baseball commission is “rather slow” in granting new franchise agreements/rights.

Can you imagine any one (1) day out of the three hundred and sixty five (365) days in a year that would be promoted as a ‘National Day of THINKING’?  On which day, there would be no broadcast of any sports events or scores, and all the sports sections of all the newspapers in this country, for that one (1) day, would be printed as the THINKING section (maybe just one sheet with the word THINK! on it). ESPN and other television and Internet sports channels would, for that one (1) day, become the THINK channel. And maybe practice a “A Golden Silence” for those 24 hours. To top it off, the United States Federal, State and Local government, leading the way, in cooperation with corporations, and businesses could promote this idea and encourage individuals and groups to not do or discuss sports for that one (1) day.  Pretty Out Rageous—and downright scary to imagine, huh?

Anyhow, uhmm, the reasons why now is the best and greatest time ever for a person to be alive on the planet Earth are: [1] We have the opportunity to benefit from all that has preceded and gone before us, as well as all that now exist.  [2] For the first time in human history, we have entered into The Age of Information, brought about by technological advancement which make it practically impossible to hide the TRUTH for longer than a few days, weeks or, at most a few years, as opposed to the hundreds and often times thousands of years[1] that it sometimes took the TRUTH to resurface after being forced into hiding or hidden by the corrupt reigning powers of the past (and there are direct connections between past and present corrupt “reigning powers”).  [3] For the first time in the history of this species, an individual can affirm by a substantial number of other individual’s personal experiences and knowledge, from a variety of cultures, races, geographical locations and chronological ages, one’s own personal revelations from the inner search of one’s heart and mind. With the understanding that they might be at odds with what most people, family, friends and associates might think and behave like.  These external source affirmations, from other individuals all over this planet - incarnate and discarnate - can often be attained/received without leaving one’s castle, house, apartment, room, sidewalk heating grate, park bench or what have you, via printed and electronic media sources who rate themselves according to how consistently and effectively intrusive into our/‘consumers’ lives they are, whether YOU like it or not.  [4] There has never been a time when the need has been so compellingly crucial, to the continuation of life on planet Earth in general, and human life on Earth in particular, for all uncorrupted individuals with sound minds and principles based on the TRUTH at all cost, to rise and actively contribute any and every “two cents worth” that we can.

The people who have and continue to defy, distort and abuse the truth for a variety of reasons - sincere to purely devious - ranging from claiming that they have an exclusive on the direct line to GOD-DESS, who is telling them how and where to lead the rest of us, through those who think and claim they have an exclusive hereditary right to rule, or once having been elected to serve, should then be allowed to do anything they want, anyway they want, and on into the international corrupt secret societies who instigate continuous wars and conflicts while cleverly fronting themselves with charities, donations to “good” causes, (sometimes) well meaning ambiguous front-line members going along to get along, and so on down to those individuals who are simply dedicated to their personal excessive gains and pseudo satisfactions at any and everyone else’s expense that they can manage, need to be exposed and seen for what they are, in order to have any realistic hope for a future worth living on Earth.

It is most important to keep in mind that people of the mind set described above are extremely intelligent, charming, clever, strong, addicted to winning at all cost, and determined to remain the same.  The key to which is, the only way that “they” can maintain those positions is with the do-nothing complicity and/or active cooperation of mostly all of the rest of us.

Most people are spiritually apathetic, oriented to, accepting of and in active (although often denied and sometimes unrealized, yet clear from actions or lack of) complicity with the corrupt ruling elite “King Rats”.  Too many are reinforcing the ‘hopeless’ way of thinking which says, “What’s the use of trying to change things, when, obviously, the most corrupt people control, and have controlled throughout (traditional) history, so why try to be individually effective against ‘them’”, and/or “It’s human nature to be cruel and stupid” . . . and so on.

The answer to which is simply, if more people commit themselves, quickly enough, to pursuing their IMP/individual maximum potential, we have a very good chance of improving the quality of life for humans on this earth, it may already be too late, but, if more people do not try, the situation will almost certainly continue to rapidly deteriorate into the extinction of people on this planet, and quite possibly right before the eyes of people who are here now.  As Mahatma Gandhi said: “Your individual acts may seem futile, but it is crucial that you do them.”

To not be able to think clearly is the worst affliction that any person can suffer with.  The next worst is to think of one’s self as essentially hopeless and/or useless, and therefore to settle for going along to get along.  In the final analysis, as far as personal fulfillment in this life is concerned, there is nothing worthwhile to loose (except your fear and volunteered slavery status), and everything to, potentially, gain (“genuine self worth, peace of mind, purpose for living and the like”) by trying [The risk – reward ratio].

When we leave this life, at most, what we may take with us shall be our pure personal memory records of what we did with our time here. The substance of which seems to narrow down to either: [1] “I consciously pursued the TRUTH and my I.M.P.[2], and tried to stimulate, influence and help anyone else that I could reach to do the same.”  [2] “I followed so and so or such and such individual, institutional faith and/or tradition. Most everyone else was doing something similar. So, I choose to go along with many things that I really did not agree with or understand, to get along with most everybody else; rather than taking the full personal responsible for seeking the TRUTH, no matter who or however many others said whatever else, however many times.”  [3] “I did not try to do my best or pursue my maximum potential for the evolution of my spirit and soul because I was scared/lazy/did not think it was worthwhile or would make any difference.”

Soooooo, “BARKING UP THE WRONG TREE(S)”, in this context refers to the fact that most people are living with their primary thoughts and actions centered around hopelessly trying to find happiness and self worth externally, and extending into, as has been said’ “Everybody wants to get to Heaven, but don’t nobody want to die.”  And most do not want to think about, much less talk about, their inevitable passing out of this life.  It has also been said, “If that which one seeks cannot be found within, it shall not be found without.”—Starhawk  

All in all, if anyone looks in the wrong place for whatever one is looking for, it will not make any difference how sincerely or long and hard one looks, what one is looking for will be impossible to find if it simply is not where one is looking.  Or, as Albert Einstein said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different results.”

And, whether one refuses to think about “it” or not, these biological bodies that our souls and spirits are now using, are going to die. That is, our present human body vehicle for our soul and spirit will, sooner or later, decay into changed matter that will not have the capacity to facilitate a soul and sentient spirit, or think.

The one thing that is for absolute certain, from our three dimensional perspective, is that we will be in the “after life” a lot longer than we will be in this life. And, we may be able to affect what that “after life” will be like for our souls, spirits and consciousness, by what we think and do with this comparatively short time that we have here now.

Where are YOU placing your long term bet?  There is no neutral in this matter.  YOU are in the game, and YOU are betting, one way or the other, your stake, which is, presently, your human life - and maybe . . . after . . . . .

DON’T BLAME GOD, or Anyone Else

The first thing that has to be done in the process of healing, whether it is an individual body or the single body of the species, is to recognize and acknowledge that whathear is wrong is wrong, however, disconcerting, psychologically and emotionally painful, and/or scary the experience may be.  Actually, this situation can be thought of as exhilarating, stimulating and motivational, in respect to the ultimate challenge and opportunity to use the greatest gift/asset that people have - our minds - the fullest.  I mean like wide open down the stretch when  the rest of the track behind you is in flames and there are only thousandths of seconds left (and right) to get safely across the finish line before the surface of the track under you is consumed and is no longer there to support you.  I mean like uh, a bat out of Hell!  Would Einstein comb his hair at a time like this, hum? here to support you.  I mean like uh, a bat out of Hell!  Would Einstein comb his hair at a time like this, hum?  This is no time to mentally dilly dally around, WE GOT A SERIOUS PROBLEM, HEAH!

This is a situation (imminent and immanent threat to the survival of the species - PEOPLE) that will not tolerate prolonging indoctrinated petty indulgences, such as thoughts and discussions about who is to blame, clever artificially sustained superior and inferior classifications, diverting attention away from one’s own devious behavior while scheming and manipulating, hidden behind a public image and/or scripted scenes being presented and/or broadcast, for others and/or mass consumption, to induce and/or sustain paralyzing confusion; and all the other tactics of the abuses of the capacity to think that have been so remarkably successful; in unnecessarily speeding up the end of peoples and other life forms time on Earth.

"Humanity’s challenge, as NASA’s Young Turks see it, is to re-create Creation ¾ to play God.  They propose that the United States, the Soviet Union, Europe and Japan attempt the most ambitious engineering project in human history: the ‘terraformation’ of Mars, the greening of the red planet.  They want to transform Mars into a new home for humankind ¾ and they believe they can do it in less than two centuries."

Anyhow ugh, back to the leading influences.  I can imagine that in their spiritually empty and miserable heart of hearts, those individuals[3] who are afflicted with the “King Rat” syndrome, might think that they are ultimately doing what is best for themselves and everyone else, or that it simply does not matter (that’s what this is all about - everything is matter-ing from the most elemental quark units through the electron, neutron and proton dance of the atom to us, homo sapiens, and beyond) what they do, so they may as well keep on doing what they are doing and what most others in their positions before them have done.  After all, what they’ve been doing, and the way that they have been doing it, has worked better than anything else (the equivalent of 12% brain capacity Max out ¾ what about the other 88%?  I mean, they’re courageous, powerfully influential, materially rich, sometimes physically healthy and/or intellectual giants, i.e., scholastically geniuses, and . . . most people want to be like “them”, which to some of “them”, who are aware of how empty they feel and how spiritually miserable they are, is proof that most people are too stupid to have any hope for.

"We all know the horrors . . . . But war is also a deep spiritual experience . . . What’s going on in this country now  part of the economic difficulty we’re in - is precisely that spiritual experiences in America have been leached out by eight years of Reagan . . . If you have no war at any cost then your have world cancer."

"But I quite agree with you that the human race needs war, though we’re not supposed to say that as good liberals or, indeed, good people.  But it seems true that the human race would not have gone in for way had there not been some biological necessity.  Genetic, whatever.  But this century’s new weapons are frustrating primal urges.  The destruction of the planet ¾ for us, anyway, is a distinct possibility . . . ."

                                            PRELUDE TO FORGIVING

Yes, as far as I am concerned I’ve already made enough mistakes to last me forever, and I could still lend two or three other people some.  Yep, despite the fact that I grew up wanting to help needy people, “save the world” . . . and all that.

I don’t want anyone to misunderstand me. I mean, I intend to always do what I can, within reason, to help most anyone in an emergency, but, in general, I want to do what I can to avoid (other than as a professional consultant) people with psychological problems of a personal nature.  That stuff can be “catching”.

Yeah, I am here to tell you it’s contagious, so you need to employ psychological quarantines if you expect to be, or find yourself exposed to that kind of muck.

I also want to hip you to the fact that I have found that there are quite a few people who are in love with and addicted to their problems.  Um hum, they make friends with their problems, and wallow in them and wrestle with them, until they convince themselves that they are a “natural” part of themselves, i.e., “That’s just the way I am”, or a host of other convenient, and generally acceptable to most, traditional excuses.

You will find (if you haven’t already), that a person of the aforementioned mind set, when they are with someone else, doesn’t (genuinely) enjoy the person they’re with . . . they want to talk about their problems.  Did you ever notice that?

Check this out, many of us have heard about how “misery loves company.”  Well, that statement is not totally accurate.  There is more to it than that.  What I have found, is that people who are into that ‘loving relationship with their problems’, once they burn you out, “layin’ it on ya”, you will be left miserable by yourself when they leave satisfied and, you’ve got it.

The good news is, I am going to share with you here a healthy and relatively, foolproof way of dealing with people of the type under consideration.

What I am practicing doing now is - when one of “them” catches me and it’s too awkward to get away - I give “them” a guarantee.  Yep, you know like when you buy something and you get a guarantee that says “Guaranteed or your money back.”  Well, that’s what I do with “their” problems.  I will guarantee anybody that I can help them solve their (psychological) problem(s) (which always has some sort of confusion, usually accompanied by some degree of pain, at the root, down to cellular memory from conception, and back to pass incarnations), guaranteed or their problem back. 

In the final analysis, the person with the problem must, indeed, sincerely want to, and be willing to do what it takes to solve their individual problem.  Otherwise, I am convinced that there is nothing anyone else can do to superimpose a solution.

I enjoyed playing the game “Ring around the roses” in elementary school.  At this point in time, psychological “ring around the roses” is not my kind of fun activity. Actually, it would be far more accurate for me to say that, to me, that kind of expenditure of time and energy is down right abjectly undesirable - to be avoided at, nearly, all cost.

FORGIVING

I forgive myself for not doing better with a number of situations and confrontations during the course of my life, so far, including not knowing better in many instances.  Anyone or anything else, incarnate or discarnate, who or that has a right to judge me on my thoughts and actions, knows or should know that one thing is for sure, and that is, I never planned to or purposely initiated any cruel or vicious thought or action to cause anyone pain and suffering, or knowingly took unfair advantage of anyone.

As far as me forgiving anyone else, I relieve myself of that matter based on fundamental and practical logic and reason rooted in compassion.  There are, and have been, too many, knowingly and unknowingly, doing too many things to cause others pain and suffering, and to take unfair advantage.  Therefore rather than assume a position of forgiving others as a full time occupation, or to perpetually mentally struggle to convince myself that anything anyone does for whatever reason I can help by ‘forgiving’ them.

 I choose to use my time and energy to do my best to not be taken unfair advantage of, prevent as much unnecessary pain and suffering for myself from whoever, wherever and whatever the source might be—as I can manage—and help as many others as I can to do the same.

As has been and is said, “God helps those who help themselves.”  For all practical purposes the statement is obviously true, in the sense that on this Earth it is apparent that any omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent force that exist does not discriminate in the matter of helping those who help themselves, indifferent, it seems, to whether or not some are helping themselves to more than they need, can ever use and/or are achieving excesses through the most vicious, deceitful, dispassionate means conceivable.  Rather, the guiding priority principle upon which “God” seems to function, on this earth, in helping those who help themselves is “Unto those who have shall more be given,” regardless to how “. . . those who have . . .” got what they have in the first place.

Therefore, I am compelled to—as succinctly expressed by Zora Neal Huston in a chapter entitled SEEING THE WORLD AS IT IS, from her autobiography, DUST TRACKS ON A ROAD—deal with this experience of sentient, conscious human Earth life “as it is” in conjunction with how I think it could be better but isn’t. I am going to continue do the best I can to not concern myself with forgiving anyone else.  As far as I am concerned that matter is between individuals and “God”.

            I accept that I am “not my brothers (or sisters) keeper”, as much as I would like to help anyone that I can.  And, at this point in time it seems to me that far too many of the worst to the least abusers of human’s capacity to be, think, know and act are using other peoples’ forgiveness as permission to keep doing whatever they are doing or not doing.

 I am rather strongly convinced that—contrary to the prayer/plea for “God” to “forgive them for they know not what they do”—too many know and choose to do exactly what they are doing, and therefore I withdraw from complicity in this matter and take the position that I don’t need to forgive or forget others “sins” (“It’s not my job.”). Likewise, I do not have any malice or seek any revenge. It’s simply not practical for me. I’m too busy doing the best I can to protect myself—from the inside out—and dealing with life as I encounter it, straight ahead.

I have decided my time and energy are better spent helping and forgiving myself so that I can help anyone else, who, in my opinion, is reasonably trying their best to help themselves, and justifiably forgiving themselves for whatever their mistakes have been. 

“HONOR THY FATHER AND MOTHER”

            Many of us surviving “Baby Boomers” have been prepared through, among other things, the sacrifices of other Boomers, and our own searches and studies to “find” ourselves. We have been blessed and protected through personal experiences with every means of mind altering and consciousness expansion available to this species that could be found or made. From the exploration and practice of various techniques of chanting¸ praying, meditation, isolation, extended family communal living and free love sexual experiences, through consumption of various plants and chemicals, to the use of electronic special effects simulations, stimulations and Virtual Realities. We have prepared to take the lead, usher in the changes, adapt, and joyfully turn over our share of stewardship of the Earth (in the best attainable condition) to the “Thirteen’s”.  The Thirteen’s are represented, in my immediate life, by my 11 years old (in 1992) daughter, Tanisha Rasanna Dyushambee, Roving Reporter for the Cumberland Cougar - Sunnyvale, California Elementary School District.

I don’t want any biological offspring from me to ever think, feel or imagine that she, he or they are required and commanded by “God”, and me, to honor me—no matter what. Or, that she, he or they owe me anything, or that I want and/or expect anyone to do anything that I tell them to solely because, “I brought you into this world”.  For me that honor would only be valid if I intended to and then did the best that I could to take care of her, him, or them, always with their best interest as my priority, until they could take care of themselves. No other Earth species demands or expects to be shown any special appreciate for propagating and providing the care and protection, for offspring, needed to ensure the survival of the species.

At best, people have children because the parents want the satisfaction and enjoyment of conceiving and/or raising them. At worst, the child or children are conceived unintentionally and are not wanted. In either case, to require the child to honor the parents solely for assuming natural responsibility seems to me to be a clear reflection of the over-blown egotism of far too many Homo sapiens. Specifically I refer to those people who have too little understanding of, and respect for, the natural order and priorities of life as a whole, as a result of a wide range of erroneous traditional and religious teachings from “authoritative sources” with less than a holistic perspective, orientation and agenda.

It is clear to me that without reasonable clarity, in regards to thinking and spiritual awareness, along with an understanding of the difference between actions that deserve to be honored and an automatic status of honor for doing a natural function like breathing, or having sex that happens to result in a spermatozoa entering an egg, the distinction of honor would not be possible, or have any relevant and practical value of benefit to any of us.

Although I am aware of the practical necessity for having competent, loyal, trustworthy and dedicated “workers” in the hunter-gatherer tribes, agricultural communities and farms, Industrial Age cities, service industries and any viable society, I am convinced that no one should ever be obligated to the absolute honoring of anyone, based solely on a biological relationship that resulted from an involuntary biological function. By which I mean that no one deserves to be automatically honored for “making” babies/people, anymore, since it’s no longer done by hand molding them out of dirt and breathing life into them, or some such creation process. The honor of being a mother or father is not something that is automatically granted because someone incubates a fetus or ejaculates sperm. The honor that can be associated with being a father or mother has to be earned after the child is born.

I refuse to accept any recognition of honor from anyone for anything, unless I am satisfied with the fact that I have earned it and deserve it, based on conscious decisions, choices and actions that I have taken that have done - as far as I know - more good than harm. As far as I am concerned, the only people who should be honored are those who live according to, and exemplify the highest standards of actions and character that adhere to essential and fundamental truths, especially when doing so would not be materially profitable and would require some sort of self-sacrifice and/or be inconvenient or painful, to some degree on some level some of the time. Merely having an orgasm does not qualify anyone for a status of honor.

What I am expressing here is based on my life’s blood, sweat, tears, study, prayers, meditations, pleasures, experiences, “real-I-zations” and whatever else has been and is a contributing part of the sum total of all that I am and think in this experience of incarnate Earth life.  In short, the best that I have at this time.

            For us humans, having thumbs to “oppose” fingers, walking upright and having large brains with a well developed capacity for abstract thinking, reasoning, logic and linguistics, and being at the top of the food chain with no tangible serious threats or challenges from any other species is an exhilarating and heady experience.  Along with all that comes a position of enormous and awesome responsibility. All of which makes being genuinely humble and not thinking of ourselves as overly important (and self-sufficient), extremely difficult. And, at the same time allows us to easily forget to properly respect babies/new humans and “lower life forms”, and to remain eternally appreciative, thankful and the like, for being so blessed.

The pea brained (proportionate to overall size) dinosaurs, without most of our attributes—religion, flags, “progress”, a contrived economic system, money or an intelligence quotient that would register on the scale by which we measure our “smarts”—existed for a substantially longer time on this earth than us Homo sapiens have. Their longevity, as far as anyone knows, was based on the absolutes of the old-old fashion way of pure survival instincts supported by sheer brute physical size and muscle power. Although some to most of the other species that co-existed with them, adapted, evolved or whatever and out lasted them, and some still exist.

            It seems as though at some time or another, in the evolutionary history of our species, someone (or some ones) equipped with thoughts and ideas decided that the natural status of human beings on Earth was just too good to be true, graciously accepted and respected without suspicions, anxieties and guilt. And so began the invention of the enormous amounts of unnecessary problems that we, Homo sapiens, have created for ourselves to solve, convinced that to simply and happily enjoy the gift of our position for as long as it naturally last, is “sinful” which translates to wrong.

And so, it seems, God the Supreme invisible being, “the Creator” of everything, followed by the lesser gods, was born (created or discovered) in the mind of this species, sometime shortly after the development of words and language.

With profound mental and visceral astonishment, awe, amazement and appreciation, in regards to Being Here Now (or ever), I accept the responsibility for what I think, say and do.  Although I acknowledge that I did not invent any aspect or part of the truth and have no exclusive access to any of it, “blind faith” is unacceptable to me. And, I am practicing unequivocally speaking the truth, as I know it, while allowing for, at least, a 1% margin of error.  With this in mind I remain open to learning more about all that I do not know, and can accept new found truths - whether I initially like them or not - and then consciously change my mind and behavior.

The tremendously powerful brainwashing effect of millions of people believing and idiotically repeating and reinforcing stupid ideas like “If there were peace on Earth life would be boring because there wouldn’t be anything to do” and, “it’s ‘human nature’ to have wars” ignores the substantial anthropological data that documents places and times where human cultures have thrived that have not been into contrived wars.  And, anyone who can’t find more than enough interesting activities on the surface and the inner and outer spaces of this planet to keep them fully occupied, with something not totally understood or mastered, for 50 to 100 years or more, without instigating wars, should be allowed, and maybe, encouraged, to check themselves out of here with the least amount of fanfare, and inconvenience to the rest of us.

There is a critical difference between sporting competition or temporary conflicts that have to be resolved as a result of honest mistakes and misunderstandings and deliberately contrived wars whose purpose is to control populations, boost pride and/or economies and the like.

It makes no sense to me for anyone to have a mind if that mind can’t be changed - and that change substantiated by a change in behavior.  I don’t know how anyone can think that they do indeed have their own mind if they don’t think that they can change their mind - and behavior.  On the other hand, a pattern or habit of changing one’s mind too often, is another matter, qualitatively as well as quantitatively - suggesting that some kind of external observation and help is indicatedJ.

Also, I will state as a fact of life (allowing for that, at least, 1% margin of error) that anyone who says and/or thinks that they living and acting in accords with spiritual principles and yet does not apply their spiritual principles on the same standard of measure where their biological mother, father, son, daughter, sister, brother, immediate blood relatives and “others” are concerned, are not living and acting on spiritual principles, but are simply using empty words of convenient application.  Engaging in, at the least, self-deception, if not out right conscious and intentional mental and spiritual fraud.

These matters are either not important and make no difference, or are crucially important and therefore require being dealt with as top priorities on a personal level.  It does not seem to be possible to ignore them away.

Children should be honored by parents and cared for as the most welcomed guest that can be received, and allowed to leave when they are able to, without debts or obligations - physical or otherwise.  Any parent’s highest reward should be realized by knowing that they have assisted in producing another high quality person capable of assisting in producing other high quality people.  The more people who exist with this orientation and mind set, the less concerned the elderly would have to be about being cared for when they need it.

People function best and enjoy it more when we do things because we want to, rather than because we are told that we should and then are required to.  We are much more likely to do what we should when we are oriented to naturally do what we should because we want to.  “If you love someone, set them free.” - Sting.

Therefore, although what follows is not a story that anyone in their right mind would enjoy telling, my youngest daughter is now 11 years old, and now that I know this much of my story, my choices are (1) tell her now, as much as I know, with the consideration in mind that a focused, swift jolt is preferable to long drawn out ignorance, confusion and agony or, (2) keep the “skeletons in the closet” and let her try to function at her best in her life’s endeavors while laboring in blind ignorance about the facts and truth.  I think that I am obligated to tell her the bitter and the sweet, because not telling her as much as is known about the truth of her immediately blood line genealogy would amount to my knowingly sustaining the lies of the past, through my silent complicity.  Knowing that if she found out the truth, say 40 or 50 years later, I could explain to her that I did not want to upset her, thought I was acting (or rather, not acting) in her best interest by “protecting her from the truth”. HUH?  Um hum, maybe you’ve heard this one before. I could then dump it all on her by asking her to forgive me or, (3) one or both of us would die, and the matter would be done with, once and for all . . . maybe?

Likewise the idea of “loyally protecting” a member of the family or the family’s image, reputation (and “honor”), et cetera, by keeping those “skeletons and dirty secrets” in the family “closet”, I recognize as a family trap - like a form of volunteered slavery - because a participant must then keep a part of their mind in “the closet” to guard the “skeletons and dirty secrets” or, they are sure to “escape” and become known to “others”.

I am more comfortable with the “If the shoe fits, wear it” school of thought and action, so I’ll take the “swift jolt” option, and try to follow the instructions in the words of folk wisdom—“Tell it like it is” (or was), “Don’t bite yo’ tongue”, and “Let the chips fall where they may.”

And, making this all public is, in part, part of a therapeutic cleansing endeavor to benefit all of the involved family, as well as any and everyone else who will apply whatever from this that YOU might personally use.

The birth certificate, for me, registered with the Petersburg, Virginia Bureau of Birth records lists my name as Edward Duglas [sic] Harris, Jr.’ “father’s name: Edward Douglas Harris”.  My biological mother, Nettie Mae Harris, maiden name Ford (now Walker from second marriage), told me, for the first time, Friday September 11, 1992 (Harvest Moon), one month and a few days prior to my 49^th birthday - marking the beginning of my 50^th year of this life - while I was trying to recover from my first full blown attack of psoriasis (exact cause not known by the medical profession - thought to be stress related) that “I never told you who your father was.” At that time she told me that actually, my real (biological) father’s name was Willy Creighton (“Who?”), that he had committed suicide approximately one year earlier (1991), et cetera. UMmph!

Mother Nettie told my sister Veronica and I for most of the seventeen years, prior to my leaving home, that she looked forward to and was confident that someday we would live together as a family - she and her husband Edward (“your father”) and my sister and I.  Nettie and Edward did not get divorced until many years after their separation—after I left home.

For the first few years after the separation Edward used to visit us, about once a year - he lived in the Harlem area of New York City and we in Virginia.  We wrote each other letters and I spent part of the summer with him when I was 15 or 16 years old.  After I left home, I would occasionally pass through Harlem and visit him.

Twenty-one years after leaving home, in Virginia, I moved back to Virginia, from California in 1982 with my one-year-old daughter Tanisha and her mother, Carol.  I started a free lance video production business and was able to get a job doing a two-day taping in New York City in the summer of 1983.  I took my sister’s oldest son Mario along with me, to help with the job, and to go meet his “grandfather Edward Harris”, for the first time.

When we went to visit my “father” and Mario’s “grandfather” we discovered that Edward was no longer living at 522 West 150^th Street, the one place where he had lived for over thirty years, since he moved to New York.  His former landlady told me that he had been “laid off”/severed from the job where he had worked for over thirty years, when new owners bought the business.

Apparently, there were no Coping with Change, Stress Management, financial planning or job search workshops included in his severance package, and (from one point of view) Edward did not adjust well to the unexpected and sudden change.  I was told by his former landlady that he was living on the streets of Harlem, had been hospitalized after being hit by a car and no one knew where I could find him.  Notices had come to his old address indicating that he had not been picking up his unemployment checks.  He had showed up in his old neighborhood a few times and bummed “a dollar or two”.

I left my business card with the former landlady, some people across the street, and at the corner bar, and asked people to call me collect when and if he came around.  I also check with the morgue.

Some weeks after we got back to Virginia I received a call from his former landlady saying Edward had been there.  I asked her to call me while Edward was there if he came back.

Edward came back some days later, the lady called me and Edward and I spoke.  I asked him if he wanted to come to Virginia.  He said yes.  I made the arrangements and was able to get him to Virginia and, after a few months, into a new apartment with Social Security disability and medicaid benefits, and scheduled transportation to and from the Senior Citizen Center.

After a few months of what, I can only assume, he must have considered too unfamiliar (and boring) surrounding and activities, Edward left one day, without telling anyone, and went back to Harlem-New York City- “The Big Apple”.  At the time he had up coming appointments to have dental work started and to have his eyes checked for glasses.  I was also about to start looking for a car for him, which he said he thought he would like to have. I did not see or talk to Edward again after he left Virginia, that time in 1985.

I moved back to California with Tanisha and Carol in 1986 - received a telephone call in early April of 1990 from Mrs. Tart, Edward’s case worker, asking if I would make burial arrangements for Edward who had died at New York City’s Bellvue Hospital on March 28,1990.  His last residence had been 400 East 30^th Street - the Bellvue Shelter.  Mr. McCarty, at the shelter said Edward had been there since February 10, 1989.  Ms. Baer at Social Security said Edward’s checks were mailed to 33^rd Street and 8^th Avenue - U.S. Post Office - General Delivery. The only person left from his immediately family, his sister Onie, told them to contact me.

            I have purposely left unchanged what I wrote about the separation of my birth certificate father and biological mother under the title “Inner Resources Obscured by Conventional Wisdom”.  At the time that I wrote “Inner Wisdom...” I was writing what I thought was, finally, an explanation for what had been the cause of the split between the two people I had always been told were my mother and father—confirmed, for all practical purposes, by birth certificate records, and by both my (recorded) mother and father who separated when I was 1 year old and my mother was pregnant with my sister, Veronica Montez.

A brief summation of the facts, chronology and so forth, inasmuch as I can piece together from present memory, answers to my questions, and the story as, most recently, told to me by Nettie, are as follows: Nettie and Willie engaged in sexual intercourse when she was 17 years old.  As a result - of one of his spermatozoa entering and fertilizing an egg in her womb - here I am, and have been for the past 50 or so years.

            Nettie did not want to marry Willie because; “he was too jealous.”  So, Nettie, apparently, entered a relationship with a handsome, mild mannered, unsuspecting (?), employed, less intense and “jealous” friend, Edward Douglas Harris, of her older brother, James Arthur Ford, and convinced Edward that one of his spermatozoa had impregnated her.  Edward and Nettie married prior to my birth.

After marrying Edward, Nettie was still, apparently, sexually attracted to Willie.  From what she told me, she left me with someone one day (I think she said a Sunday afternoon) and met Willie at her father’s (Arthur Ford - deceased) house where they engaged in sexual intercourse and Nettie became pregnant with my biological sister, Veronica Montez.

Two or three years after Nettie left Edward she decided to give it a go with Willie, who had moved from Virginia to Pennsylvania.  That arrangement was short lived when Nettie (“No, he was never violent . . . he was just too jealous.”), after a few weeks, took “her” children, “Edward Jr.” (me) and Veronica, left Willie in Pennsylvania and went to her older sister’s in Baltimore, Maryland for a few weeks before moving back to her father’s house in Hopewell, Virginia.

I had no idea what was going on during that time and do not yet recall What Willie looked like or anything about him (I’m a good candidate for a memory recall study of that period of time, as well as my various “extraterrestrial” communications and encounters). So, I realize now that for all practical purposes I was simply treated like the proverbial mushroom—kept in the dark and fed… which continued for a half century.

Nettie also told me, on September 11, 1992, that Willie had wanted to tell Veronica and I, for years prior to his “suicide” (which his sister, Kate, and his brother, Curtis, are suspicious of), that he was our father, but that she (Nettie) had begged him not tell us.

Willie and his wife visited Nettie and her husband (Ernest Walker) as recently as the 1980’s, in their house in Hopewell, Virginia in which Ernest and Nettie live today (November 16, 1992).

I do not recall, ever seeing, hearing or otherwise knowing about the man (Willie Creighton) that Nettie is sure is my biological father - and Veronica’s.  I do have a vague memory of being in Philadelphia, when I was 3 to 5 years old, for what I had assumed - up until September 11, 1992 - was a vacation.

I was astonished, to say the least, to hear my sister, Veronica tell me, after Nettie told me what was to me this extraordinary news of this amazingly well kept secret and I had taken a few days to prepare myself for telling her this “amazing secret”, that Willie had visited her one day in the 1970’s and told her that he was her father.  To which she says she gave no response, forgot about and never mentioned to anyone, until my “amazing secret news” brought it back to the surface of her memory . . . along with the memory of Willie “standing at the top of a stairway”, in Philadelphia, “with a scary look on his face” and saying to her (Veronica between 2 and 4 years old) that “I’m going to kill your mother.”  Given ample opportunity and motive, Willie never attempted to murder or injury Nettie.

Sister Veronica said to me that she doesn’t think that this matter is important enough to spend any time thinking about, because we “can’t do anything about what happened back then”.  Her question to me was”  “What difference does it make now—will you change anything you’re doing, or will do in your life based on whatever the truth is about whoever your father was?”  We agreed that we would both be interested in knowing whom in the family and community has known all these years and never breathed a word to she or I.  Sister Veronica has had very little personal and private time in her life, so far, to think about or do anything not directly related to raising and supporting her five children (and now her daughter’s children), after they were abandoned by her husband and children’s father, Theodore McCoy.  Theodore was an older boy who took advantage of her unprotected innocence while she was in high school, and then, for all practical purposes, had to be tracked down and forced to married her. After which they produced a total of five children before he left them.

In the amazement of the moment I didn’t think of this when sister Veronica initially asked me the question, but, it is a well known fact of human history that many heads have rolled and much blood has been shed over this issue of blood line descendants—especially males, successions, family trees and so on. This has been (and still is) one of the most important matters to most peoples in the history of this species.  Whether this should, should not or will in the future, be the right or best way is not the issue here - just the fact of the matter, that this has mostly been (and is) the way, so far.  So why shouldn’t this, at the least, be of interest to me about mine?

I know my mind is now considerably more at ease and I feel a lot better than I did when I was dealing with the initial shock. After which I began to piece together the actual sequence of events, mind sets, attitudes, environment, circumstances and other related influences on the people directly involved—back then “before my time”, and during the time of ‘conception’ and ‘the beginning’ of the cells dividing and multiplying, making the organs and body parts that produced my current atomic body human form—“this speck of clay - And spirit shall begin – To feed on hope, - To learn how truth blows cold and - loves betray.”—C. Day-Lewis, and so on, agonizing over how and when to tell Tanisha, whether or not I should write this, and how and what to write.

As far as I know now, my biological mother lied to the man who died thinking that he was my father, lied on the birth certificates, did everything that she could to keep the man who was our biological father from telling my sister and I that he was our “real” father, and waited until he had been dead for a year, after committing suicide(?), before telling me the truth - while I was recovering from a stress related ailment.

In my opinion, this experience is the real-I-zation of the ultimate personal deception, because of the significant effects and implications, psychological and spiritual—and the fact that two of the three principles are “dead and gone”, and as such, cannot speak, incarnate, for themselves.

The bottomline is this story is full of what most people, in what is called “The Civilized World”, would consider to be disgusting, despicable, irresponsible and dis-honorable, behavior and standards - irregardless of whomever may be embarrassed and pained by the facts being bluntly stated.  And, there are many families with this type of hidden/unspoken secret [one place to find some statistics is the book DIANETICS by L. Ron Hubbard]. The choices for everyone involved, dictated by circumstances now beyond anyone’s control, are to live with the truth in the open or die with the lie(s).

As far as anyone knows and can substantiate, ALL beings of this species has been, are, and probably, always will be, fallible - from Adam & Eve, who blamed the snake, through, Krishna, Buddha, Abraham, Jesus The Christ—“My God, why have thou forsaken me?”, Mohammed, the popes, Gandhi, Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., “The Gipper”, Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson, Malcolm X, Marilyn Vos Savant, you, me and so on.

            None of what is written here, as far as I’m concerned, diminishes the significance of or my appreciation for the loving and positive things that Nettie, Edward and others have taught me (and/or what I have learned from them) that has been and is useful, and that laid the foundation for my continuing existence—in pursuit of my IMP (Individual Maximum Potential).

Nettie says that her natural mother died when she was a young child.  A woman who was kind and loving to her and wanted to marry her widowed father, Arthur Ford, died shortly after Mr. Ford married her first step-mother, a troubled alcoholic woman who was strict and abusive, and also died.  My grandfather, Mr. Ford then married a third woman Mary Creighton, who was strong, attractive, charming, manipulative and selfish, and basically regarded and used Nettie as a servant.

My biological mother Nettie had and has her reasons, conscious and unconscious, for whatever she has said or not said, done or not done.  I don’t hate her or harbor any grudges against her.  Her mistakes have not diminished my PURE LOVE for her—because I think I, at least, partially, KNOW and UNDERSTAND her.

WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE . . . and why?

I am beginning to write the following on October 25, 1995.  I was born on this date 52 years ago.  I had a revelation a couple of days ago that I consider to be my “spiritual”[1] or “psychological[2] consciousness” birthday present. 

            I decided some years ago that, at least, one of the major problems fundamentally afflicting the human species on the planet Earth is that far too many of us consider whatever it is that we “believe in . . .” or “don’t believe in . . .” to be the most important influence in our lives and on our behavior. And, we are too often willing to “do whatever it takes”, from dying for, to killing, to hold onto and protect whatever belief it is that we choose to lock into rather than to seriously consider; “What if what I believe is wrong?” Followed by setting the priority to seeking, finding, accepting and living, as best one can, with knowledge and Truth in our hearts and minds to guide one's thinking and behavior, beyond belief.

A most disturbing and graphic reminder and example of deep and extensive pain, suffering, death and destruction that can result from not asking one’s self this question, when needed the most, is former U.S. Secretary of Defense, during the Viet Nam War, Robert MacNamara who has recently (circa early 90's) confessed to the World in his then newly published book that he now realizes that he was wrong in what he believed while promoting and directing that unnecessary, corrupt, dishonorable, vicious, invasive and massive war campaign.

“What if” he had allowed himself to most seriously consider this question and had come to realize then, in the 1960’s, rather than now, less than 5 years before the year 2000, the next millennium, that he was simply, seriously and severely wrong about what he believed regarding ordering hundreds of thousands of people to fight, kill and die for what he now realizes was his and other’s mistakes.

Some twenty or so years ago, after considerable thought, contemplation, meditation, prayer and the life, I came to the conclusion that “I don’t care what I believe.”  I came to this conclusion based on the fact that I realized that many of the beliefs that I had been so sure of and felt so strongly about, for the first twenty or thirty or so years of this lifetime, had no “universal validity”, “practical application” and such - can be and too often are irreconcilable, therefore it was stupid, futile and pointless for me to cling emotionally, romantically or even heroically on to “traditional beliefs” (which I had been taught/indoctrinated with) that were counter productive to - what I decided was my main objective in this school of Earth life incarnation - pursuing my individual maximum potential on all levels with the priority being the attainment of wisdom grounded in experiential knowledge having “universal validity” and “practical application” for the most important reason being, that this is the only stuff I may[3] be able to “take with Me” and will need when I (that is this sentient spirit/soul) shed this three dimensional physical body/vehicle and get out of this life.

“In denial” - about something or another - is a term we hear often these days used to describe the psychological status of a large segment (maybe the majority) of our population.  Along with this mental state of denial is, often to usually, a corresponding feeling of being troubled, ranging from somewhat sad to pathetic apathy to the numbness of the living dead, which seems to have reached epidemic proportions.[4]

I am regularly reminded, by someone or something, that many to most people are locked into a state of denial about one of the two most important events - birth and death - in anyone’s existence.  This denial is usually expressed in questions or statements like “What’s the use of thinking about (death) it?” or “I don’t like to, and/or don’t want to, think about it.”

It is clear to me that not wanting to or not liking to think about “it” does not change the fact that we are all going to have to deal with “it”, sooner or later, and we can never be absolutely certain which it will be.  Therefore, the obvious and apparent “use of thinking about it” is to help prepare ourselves for dealing with “it” when the time comes.  Discard any thoughts of a “a morbid fixation” because this is fundamentally different from that.  The thinking and planning for this should be in the spirit of thinking about and planning for a comfortable retirement, always with the emphasis on being as ready as we can before “it”, and in the meantime, making the most of right now.

My declaration of “I don’t care what I believe” I think about as my first mental step toward freeing my mind from the fear of - manifest in the denial of - considering all the possibilities that my brain can process, beyond what “I believe(d)” in and especially those things that seem to me to be the most objectionable and/or I just don’t understand.

I thought about a statement and question that many of us have heard repeatedly throughout the course of our Earth life; that is, so and so “has lost their mind,” or “have you lost your mind?”

I read some years ago that one of the consciousness frontiersman (I think it was Carl Jung or Albert Einstein) when asked what he believed in replied that he did not need to believe because he relied on knowledge.  This way of thinking I recognized, identified with and had previously adopted when I consciously and clearly rejected belief/”blind faith” (with my declaration of “I don’t care what I believe.”) as the highest and most desirable level of consciousness for me to aspire to having relative Free Will and whatever time I have left in this incarnation.

It seemed and seems to me that the worst affliction that any human can be dis-eased with is the incapacity to be able to think freely and clearly, since many (maybe most) people agree that the one characteristic that distinguishes humans “from” and “above” all other Earth species is our Free Will capacity and potential for being able to THINK creatively and constructively - demonstrated by a corresponding change in our actions and behavior either over some extended period of time or relatively quickly.

So, after living comfortably with the idea that “I don’t care what I believe”, for about the last twenty years, this revelation that I referred to in the opening paragraph came as quite a surprise to me.  The revelation was and is that I have beliefs that are more important to me than most everything I have been spending my time doing, and most shocking to me was the realization that I have been keeping secret, repressing and procrastinating about openly expressing, my most profound beliefs for many years going back to my childhood.

This revelation and realization presented quite a dilemma for me to resolve, until it became clear to me that (especially considering my beliefs) admitting, allowing, and acknowledging the coherent experiential validity which establishes the foundation and fabric of my beliefs was and is vitally important to me.

I remembered a joke about a man who was jogging when he saw a very attractive woman jogging ahead of him, so he jogged up along side of her and introduced himself, whereupon the woman asked him which God he believed in.  After jogging along for a few moments in silence the man answered that he had never decided or thought about which God he believed in.  The woman then said to him that he should, because One of Them is in charge, as she jogged on out of sight, leaving him standing there thinking about it.  Someone(s) is (are) also responsible for the mess that humans and life on this planet find ourselves presently in.

It also became clear to me that what I believe is based, predominately, on a series of experiences that I have had going back to my earliest childhood, as well as many years of study, meditation, prayer, thinking, and what I believe may well be some sort of telepathic contact, communication (and maybe more) with extraterrestials, god(s), goddess(es) or whatever.

The bottom line is that I think I have coherent reasons to support what I believe, and I know that the most important factor to me is the TRUTH, whether I like it or not, and even if it means that what I believe now will be replaced by some knowledge yet to come or some other belief that my mind will formulate at some later time.

One thing that I am absolutely certain about my beliefs is that they are at odds with the official belief structures of the Earth’s major hierarchical religious institutions, as well as that they are not in agreement with the existing economic and political systems

Here are some of the ideas I currently believe and/or believe in and have what I think about as coherent faith in:

My consciousness/soul existed before it inhabited this human body and shall continue to exist after my final departure from this human body.

God-Dess has spoken to me from the void - Samadhi without seed experience.

There have been markers along the path of my Earth life that point, so to speak, and indicate that this Earth is not where my soul/consciousness originates from.

One of my assignments (as a tool of God-Dess) for this Earth life is to study, investigate, analyze and transmit, telepathically, updated information/data concerning the current status of life in general on this planet and in particular on the whos, whats, whys and hows of human consciousness and behavior, from the most powerful to the least.

It is possible that there will be another, seemingly abrupt, quantum leap forward in the evolutionary development of the human species, and that this has to happen soon or the human species will be extinct on this planet, or very near to extinction 100 years from now.

My primary assignment and purpose for being incarnate on Earth is to do everything I can think of and implement to help preserve the continued existence of the human species, if we can somehow relatively quickly and dramatically have manifest a shift in our thinking/consciousness and behavior away from the nearly all out race towards annihilating ourselves and everything else that we can take out before and with us.

Death does not need any help.  One of these days our Sun will expend it’s energy and die/change forms.  There is no legitimate hurry.  It is ignorant, illogical, nonsensical and sure to reap increased doom and gloom if the priorities of the leading edge of the human population on this planet continues to be, for all practical purposes, the worship of speed and pursuit of financial/material gain, control of others and all of nature for short term Worldly gratification and status, above our best long term interest of the highest level of harmony, balance and order attainable as humans.

REAL THANG JAZZ - ATTAINING AND SUSTAINING ECSTASY

How about using a National Treasure that is highly regarded worldwide, to attain and sustain the real-I-sation of the experience that is variously described as ecstasy, nirvana, Christ or God-Dess consciousness, natural high, YOUtopia or whatever terminology one prefers to use to attempt to describe the experience?  Some Jazz musicians, once upon a time, referred to this experience as “taking a ride”, or as expressed by Kitty, a character in Xam Cartier’s novel, MUSE-ECHO BLUES:  “I latch onto one note and float to remote uncharted stars ‘til sixth sense, it grounds me for my own good..”

As you may have guessed, the particular method for getting there that I am going to discourse on, is Jazz music performance (active penetrating vehicle technique), although this applies equally to some sensitive and attuned listeners who can attain and sustain the desired effect through hearing (receptive vehicle technique).  The state of ecstasy can also be attained from movement, in jazz dance and other styles and techniques.

You may have heard the one about the woman who asked the now discarnate, Maestro “Satchmo/Pops” Louis Armstrong “what is jazz?” to which he relied, “If you have to ask, you’ll never know.”  This response, attributed to the Maestro Armstrong, is reflective of two important traits of many of the earlier “Jazz” musicians: (1) keen discretion in regards to sharing knowledge with strangers, necessitated by rampant plagiarism and the distribution of vicious propaganda aimed at discrediting them; (2) very little interest in explaining and defining, with the priority intensely focused on, “doing it”:  It don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that swing.” (discarnate Maestro Edward Kennedy “Duke” Ellington.

As we know, the only think that is constant in the Universe is Truth, everything else changes, including feelings and ways of thinking (for survivors).  Over the years there has been an on going controversy, among listeners, people who perform the music, musicologists, educators, etc., about the definition and suitability of the word “Jazz” to describe this art form and wide spectrum category of music.  Occasionally all of the aforementioned attributes, i.e., listener, performer, musicologist, educator, etc., can be found in one individual such as Dr. “Billy” Taylor.

We have come from the initial application of the word “Jazz” to a kind of music The world seems to have been previously used to describe an active, colorful, free-wheeling lifestyle, through the acceptance and use of the term by the early leading innovators and performing artist - without a verbal definition, to the later rejection of the term by innovators and performing artist of the evolving art form, to the current -1991- Taylor Made Piano services, the first segment of which is, “What Is Jazz”, conceived, hosted and narrated by Dr. Taylor, and being broadcast on national Public Radio, in which Dr. Taylor defines the elements and components of, demonstrates on piano, plays recorded examples and talks about the history and various stylist, etc. of “Jazz” music; which includes the historical fact that two to three years ago the United States Congress, declared “Jazz” to be a National Treasure.  The establishment of which, “seals” the deal; although the term “African American Classical Music” may be a more accurate description of the art form, in regards to it’s historic origin, the word “Jazz” positioned by popular usage, longevity and declaration, is here to stay.

With the acceptance of these facts in mind, and comfortable with the knowledge that historical facts (The music existed before the term was applied, etc.) will not change to suit, even, official declarations, I have put together what I consider to be the “ultimate” definition of “Real Thang Jazz” music: “The highest expression of auditory communications/intercourse possible for people, i.e., the most sophisticated method of transmission and reception of perceivable frequency vibrations; transmitted to the brain through the ear canal passageway, with the capacity necessary to transport the mind to a  level of the etheric plane, fourth and fifth dimension, state of ecstasy; initiated by one, or two or more people simultaneously and employing the method of spontaneous creativity.[1]  And is inclusive of the precursors, Blues, Sanctified and Gospel[2], African drumming - chanting = singing, and all spontaneously created/improvised music from all cultures and times.”

Yes, I like the word jazz, and words in general, yet, I acknowledge that what I like, is not always in synch, with accuracy.  I will suffice it by saying; in jazz there is no mistakes, there is simply incoherence or coherence, displeasing or pleasing, dissonance of consonance.

It is also necessary to make a clear distinction between electronic computer generated jazz music (um hum, and I like some of that to) and the “real thang” jazz music.  The latter of which requires sentient breathing entities, in order to have the fourth and fifth, etc. dimensional experience of “getting off”, or whatever YOU prefer to call it; and obviously, if one can know precisely where and what every note and nuance is going to be in electronically generated computer music, it simply can never to aesthetically equal to purely unpredictable, spontaneously created, “real thang” jazz, which has the unique elements of free flowing imagination, and surprise; and YOU KNOW how much we the people love surprises and dreaming/imagination, without which life would quickly become eternally boring.

So, I think there will never be a time when one or more inorganic electronic devises will be able to independently communicate, intercourse and 'imaginate' to the considered level, of ecstasy; mainly because this is fourth and fifth dimensional, spiritual plane stuff requiring the breath of life - the most sophisticated transmission of energy.

Musician, actor, composer, etc., Dudley Moore has said he finds “real thang” jazz to be “more viscerally pleasing” than other kinds of music, which he has studied, knows and can do.

If all of this is not clear after reading this, considering it/computation in you bio-computer (brain), I suggest that you tune in and listen regularly to Marion McPartland’s show, Piano Jazz, broadcast weekly on National Public Radio, and/or any other coherent Jazz broadcast and performances, including Dr. “Billy” Taylor’s Taylor Made Piano, George Colona’s Afro Pop World, Ruth Brown’s Blues Stage, The John Hammond Years series, The American Jazz Radio Festival hosted by Michael Born, Ed Love’s The Evolution of Jazz, Steve Cushing’s Blues Before Sunrise - The Blues Heritage Showcase, all of which are also broadcast on National Public Radio, and a considerable number of other radio and television sources throughout the National that have regular jazz programming; not the least of which includes cable television’s Arts and Entertainment channel (A&E) and Black Entertainment Television (BET), WGBH in Boston and other Public Broadcast Stations (PBS) on VHF television stations nationally, radio stations KJAZ, Jazzbo and others on KCSM - San Mateo College in the San Francisco Bay area, Carolyn Taylor & Jeremy Coleman of Definistration 895 (they play almost anything), the jay Sennet Jazz show, the Bob Halahand hours, my favorite voice, Becky Lilas, who has the most impeccable taste imaginable in her selections from the vast historical and contemporary archives of jazz, and one of the two most sensual voices (the other being Kimberly Santos who also has flawless taste in her selections on the Traditional Jazz show on WVST 91.3 FM, Virginia State University) to announce her choices with, and others on WHRV in Hampton Roads, Virginia, Henry Wales, Stephanie Piles the Mid-day lady and others on WCVE in Richmond, KPFA and WBUR in Boston, Massachusetts, and quite a few college and university radio stations across the united States, including Stanford in Palo Alto, California, The Commonwealth of Virginia University in Richmond, and WVST at Virginia State University - Petersburg (Dr. “Billy” Taylor’s alma mater).  My use of a “considerable number” and “quite a few” is in no way intended to imply that Jazz is getting the kind of attention and air play that it deserves as a National Treasure.  Everyone that I did not mention should send me your information.  I will pass it on to anyone who requests it, as well as do whatever else I can to help spread the word.

The most important factors related to the lack of promotion, in America, of this National Treasure art form at the shameful “proof in the pudding” facts that the great majority of the population of the United States is not getting the benefit of it’s prime performing arts National Treasure, and still, as we rapidly approach the New Age of the next millennium, have a negative opinion bordering on fear, influenced, primarily, by the “word of mouth” passing down of the early years propagation of negative propaganda ranging from “. . . the Devil’s music, played in dens of iniquity by evil people . . .” to “It’s too complicated”, amounting to simply the jazz illiteracy of most people in the U.S., which makes for the extraordinarily peculiar situation in which the general populations of many foreign countries have been and still are more knowledgeable about and have more appreciation for this art form than the general population of the country of it’s origin.  Mrs. Elaine Lorillard, who along with her husband, John, started the Newport Jazz Festival in 1954, can attest to this, along with Willis Conover of the Voice of America’s Jazz music broadcast and many others, most significantly, the Jazz musicians who have expatriated and/or toured in other countries.

You might try thinking this through to an understanding:  The Voice of America has for decades employed Willis Conover, who has done and excellent job of putting together and hosting their VOA radio broadcast of American Jazz to millions of people in foreign countries “behind the Iron Curtain” in a propaganda campaign to promote a favorable and positive image of America, which evidently has been very effective - the “Iron Curtain” has dissolved, in contrast, most Americans in “the free World” are still illiterate in regards to our own National Treasure - Jazz, for reasons stated previously, along with the sociological factors that Nat Adderley and others can clearly articulate for anyone who is genuinely interested.  Why should this be as it is?  Oh, yeah, I guess you heard on CNN about American troops using the weapon of blaring rock music on the battle field to induce the enemy soldiers to surrender, in the massive Desert Storm operation.

Seeing as you have never heard of me, and I am used to encountering people who think like: “Who do you think you are, to have the audacity and the gumption to claim to give an “ultimate” definition for Jazz music and connect it to Christ (consciousness)/God-Dess consciousness and all that?”  If you are of the mind set referring to, first of all, chill out.  I know this definition of mine narrows down to “what I think” (my two cents worth), and as a matter of fact, I am interested in what YOU think if what you choose to express is honest and reasonably well thought out.  In my opinion, the most pathetic condition that can afflict anyone, is the inability to think clearly.

But, anyhow, the following are some of my thoughts about who I think I am:  I have described myself, to a few people in the years since I last earned money as a musician and music teacher, as an “undercover musician”, meaning primarily that although I have not been employed in the profession of music for some years now, I am at heart a musician/artist (as well as the other thought that might occur as to that description).

My “official” (which is not to discount or diminish my Southern “Negro” Baptist beginnings - and actually I have been about this since I can remember thinking - but as far as a conscious decision as an adult, was “unofficially” and simply a part of what my parents and others in our community and culture taught their children) journey on the path of consciousness raising, real-I-zation of God-Dess relationship, eternal truths Seeker, answers to the meaning of life questions, trying to get to heaven or whatever YOU want to call it, began in 1967 when I was in my 24^th year on the planet Earth and attended a three day seminar at George Washington University in Washington, D.C., conducted by Jerry Jarvis on his return to the United States, after studying in India with the Maharishi Mahesk Yogi, before the Maharishi came to America to personally teach and preside over the Transcendental Meditation organization, which has evolved into an accredited university, etc.  I was initiated into TM at the end of the three day seminar.

This personal quest, and pursuit of my individual maximum potential (i.m.p.) continues and includes past enrollment and participation in the first 40 days Intensive Training class at the now defunct, Arica Institute, Inc. - Boston, Massachusetts teaching house in 1973.  Dr. John Lilly studied with the founder, Oscar Ichazo in the desert of Arica, Chile before he wrote the book, The Center of the Cyclone.

I am also an ordained minister with an honorary Doctor of Divinity title and founder of an officially inactive branch[3] of the Universal Life Church.

One of the things that I know for sure, at this point, is that from the three dimensional, consensus reality, objective perspective or point of view: I am an enigma, or as my alter ego, Smedley, says now and then:  “You are a strange man.”, to which I respond “I’m not from here.”  I do know some rather unusual thought devices that will take me out of the ordinary path of three dimensional consensus reality.  For example, my inner reference to everything that exist and happens in Creation I think about as “all that jazz,”  which I translate to the weaving term “warp and woof” or, everything that exist and happens in Creation as horizontal, vertical (and spiral) threads woven on the loom of Creation, all interrelated in one way or another.  Supported by the “scientific fact” (if I’m not mistaken) that everything that we (people) know of in the Universe, with our current mental capacity, when broken down to their simplest fundamentals, are composed of four or five basic chemical elements.

My World view opinion is: Life on the planet Earth is in deep trouble, mainly because the most influential and powerful “World leaders” are stuck and committed, to their covert and overt intelligence backgrounds and traditions; determined, at all cost, to make everything, including different or “new” ideas, fit into their old way of thinking, which suffers from an imbalance between the Heart chakra oriented to compassion, and the brain which facilitates the Mind/reason (intellect).  The future of peoples life on this planet demands that there be a more equable balance implemented (substantiated by the priority use of the World’s resources) between the Heart and Mind.

Assessment:  Principle World leaders have little to no awareness (or past experience) of the quickening frequency vibrations permeating the planet Earth demanding the acknowledgment of Truth as the priority, on this planet ruled by the Heart.  Intelligence is finite.  Heart chakra connection is pathway to Eternal Life.  Problems further exasperated by extraordinary incompetence and/or wrong intentions.

Best example:  Saddam Hussein ass kicking (if you’re offended by this language you should have spoken up when the “leader of the Free World” characterized “liberating” Kuwait[4] in these terms, that indeed to “trickle down” almost instantly to anyone old enough to walk to the playground alone), i.e., the Desert Storm offensive.

The main criterion that was established by this “heroic” venture in respect to a “New World Order” is that it is the same as the old World order, in that they both affirm for the present and future generations that the only thing that works for people on Earth when they have “irreconcilable” differences is a violent war, preferably to “annihilation” since Saddam Hussein does not seem to have been “taught a lesson” or personally suffered in the least, being still one of the richest people in the world, having his birthday nationally celebrated, the submission of the Kurds to him, beginning process of selling Iraqi oil to the world, etc.  Leaving the people and all life of the Planet Earth with the reality that the situation in “the middle East” appears to be far worst, considering the “blood bath”, destruction, political instability and staggering ecological disaster.  Most of which was predicted by the majority of the former U.S. Secretaries of Defense who advised against what was done.

Now we seem to be witnessing and, for most, participating in a most bizarre example of trying to make sense out of nonsense with all the orgasmic euphoria, flag waving, celebrating and promoted feelings of elevated national pride.

What do you think is the difference between this situation and the idiocy of a philosophy and practice that is based on: When there is doubt about your options, if you are strong enough and have the intelligence enough[5] demonstrate your rightfulness and superiority by destroying and killing?

Summation-Solution:  The facts should be enough for anyone with a functioning brain to not only question the competency of “our World leaders” but also their Real intentions.  As a sage, who used to live in the community that I grew up in, would say in response to almost anything anyone would say to him[6] “Do the best you can.”  I think the answers and the means to solve most and maybe all of the major problems that confront people on Earth are readily available, blocked by corruption and distorted priorities.

I am now in Hope(ing)well, Transmitting and receiving with some incarnate and discarnate Masters and Adepts, and being cautious of decoys, diversions and obstacles.

Anyhow, uhmm, treat yourself and everybody else that you can as good as you can, and try YOUR best to have a lot of hope for a better future.  I am betting that we can and will know the TRUTH, INDIVIDUALLY, of all these things for ourselves, no matter what one’s background has been.

THE TRANSITION PHASE INTO THE NEW AGE

            This period of time is being described by some as being a transitional phase into the New Age.  I and some others are convinced that in order for the people of this planet to allow a Truly new way of thinking, living and behaving to come about and take place, we are going to have to fundamentally change our minds, starting with getting rid of the blocked waste energy on the mental plane so that the Spirit of the New Age can flow through.  In other words, if one’s mind is full of religious, political, traditional, psychological waste, it is essential to empty it of such in order to refill it with something “new” and more useful.  How about, at least, trying to get rid of that tired old do-do?

An experience I had as an adolescent, which was totally out of the ordinary and that I never revealed to anyone until a year or so ago, circa 1990, when I told my daughter, Tanisha, happened one night when I was lying in bed, well and sober as a child (before LSD, crack, etc.). I observed, for a considerable time, a coil of snakes at the foot of my bed which I felt totally at ease with, all the more unusual because before and after that experience I was very afraid of snakes (less now).  I have had other more tangible experiences relating to snakes (Lord Vishnu’s favorite) since then and have realized, or simply constructed a connected link to what is described by William Bramley[1] as being the “Uncorrupted Brotherhood of the Snake”.

My version[2] of the relevant and practical aspects of this (“Uncorrupted Brotherhood of the Snake”) today is verbalized as follows. Treating the branches will not work.  The root must be treated.  Think about it!  Keeping in mind that as Edward B. Fisk, Education Editor for the New York Times has said, “The U.S. education system has never been geared to teach people how to think.”)

UNCORRUPTED BROTHER AND SISTER-HOOD OF THE SNAKE/TRUTH

‘Cause it’s about time somebody stood up for the Snake.  This is not about worshipping snakes, charming snakes, challenging snakes, kissing snakes or anything of that sort.  It is like this - as Alan Watts put it: “If you ask most people why they behave the way that they do or believe what they do, they’re likely to say that their parents or the previous generation/tradition taught them to believe this way, and if you ask their parents why, their parents will likely answer that their parents… and so on and so forth until you get back to Adam and Eve where you ask Adam who says that Eve told/taught him to do what he did, and Eve says that the snake told her. Whereupon you ask the snake about the matter and the snake doesn’t say anything.[3]

Which brings us to our current situation in which we ALL need to, and have no other viable choice[4] than to climb up in the tree(s) of knowledge, partake of all the fruits, and find, or at least try our best to find the answers that we need.

Nah, you can’t join this.  You know you are in “it” or you don’t.  YOU CAN begin to KNOW that you are already in “it”.

No secret rituals or initiations:  It’s time to self-initiate and share with everybody everything that you know; this is in regards to information, i.e., knowledge of SPIRITUAL relevance that relates to all life forms and material existence - simply because the need is apparent for everyone to have the best and True information in order to make the right and necessary decisions that have to be made, one way or another.  It is absurd to think that we can ‘ignorant our way’ into a new and better future, by hiding from, or hiding the Truth.  Otherwise we likely will not survive as a species much longer anyhow.

If the Truth can’t help us, then what’s the . . .?  One’s private affairs, activities, etc., rightfully belong in the category of discretionary sharing with those of choice.

It is time to take up our sleeping Spiritual giants, climb up in the tree(s), re-member that we and the tree(s) are related parts of the ONE DIVINE WHOLE, and that not only do we have a right to everything that the tree(s) has to offer, we also have a responsibility to claim access and use it ALL but not AB-use any.

The trees and the snakes were here on Earth first, much earlier and, for sure, the trees provided and continue to provide a vital part of what made and makes our existence possible.  They can do without us, but we can not do without them.  Acknowledgment of these facts should elicit from us, nothing short of, the utmost respect, appreciation . . . and even a kind of devotion and honor.

It is difficult to impossible for me to think of a reason why anyone should exist[5] who is offended by and/or opposed to the facts of all life being related, and thinks that the species Homo sapiens is unquestionably the most important element in the equation of life - end of story - rather than merely the fortunate beneficiary of the contributions of other life forms.  Why should the wrong thinking, behavior and actions of some be allowed to ruin everything for everyone?

It is written in the Christian bible, of these times, that “The meek shall inherit the Earth.”  Discarnate former Harvard University professor and renowned Consciousness Frontiersman Timothy Leary has been quoted as having said:  “The meek shall inherit the Earth when the strong no longer want it.”  And, it is written in a four page paper - titled WORLD SCIENTIST’ WARNING TO HUMANITY - released on November 18, 1992 by a group of 1,575 of this world’s top scientists, which included 99 Nobel prize winners, that “No more than a few decades remain before the chance to avert the threats we now confront will be lost and the prospects for humanity immeasurably diminished.  Human beings and the natural world are on a collision course.” Believe it or not.

There is no place to hide.   We can not ignore this away.  Pretending, avoiding, twisting, distorting, insisting, resisting, etc. will not make sense out of non-sense, or indefinitely avoid the inevitable individual (and species) confrontation with The Truth.

“They/we/I can’t handle knowing all of the TRUTH” . . .will not cut it any longer.  Prove it.  “They” is Us, i.e., YOU and ME.

The only requirement is dedication to the pursuit of our I.M.P.s[6] for the purpose of attaining, maintaining and sustaining the experience of Enstacy[7] /GOD-DESS consciousness in the context of individualized “self” as related to the whole, or in other words, “myself”[8] as an expression of the DIVINE UNIVERSAL/SPIRITUAL/GOD-DESS whole transported to Earth’s consensus reality three dimensional plane by the vehicle of the Soul, i.e., a piece of GOD-DESS with the DIVINE capacity to know, which seems to be a separate(d) part, i.e., “me”, “I”, Ralph, Smedley, Jane or whatever word used to identify this piece of GOD-DESS, when thought of from the limited perspective of the illusory[9] nature of the three dimensional orientation, brought about by the etheric plane VEIL which was drawn between the People/three dimensional/Earth plane and the World of the ETERNAL SPIRIT.  (More about why and all that later.)

The course of Re-knowlogy:  When YOU think YOU are ready to begin to stop expending such extraordinary effort/energy to limit your potential capacity of GOD-DESS within YOU, a good place to start, to let your inner Spirit guide/Higher Self get through to the surface of YOUR conscious MIND, is to think pray/meditate/focus/contemplate, or whatever YOU want to call it, on letting the Truth of the New Age (actually all ages) Testament which is written in Your Heart and Mind express itself in action in your daily life, in other words stop going along with what you don’t understand, or/and don’t agree with, to get along.  You will likely feel rather lonely until YOU learn to be “detached yet intimately involved” and come to understand and know that you are a part of something that always was and always will be, besides which there are a rapidly increasing number of people who are tuned and tuning into the same modulation.  Individually coming to grips with the fact that this is top priority work seems to be not only worth doing but absolutely necessary.  If, YOU are going to find anything in YOUR Heart and Mind, the only one who can do it for YOU, is YOU, and as has been previously said, and Starhawk has written in the poem version of the traditional “Charge of the Star Goddess”, “. . .for if that which you seek you find not within yourself, and will never find it without.”

Remember: “It Ain’t Necessarily So” just because most people agree about whatever.

SWEET DREAMS

            Once upon a time, a long time ago, before most of the members of this earth's species (Homo Saps:) lost touch with our transcendental CREATOR, God-dess given natural Divine inherent rights to taste and enjoy, in our physical atom body forms, all of the pleasures available to us with due respect and appreciation, and without any ab-use or guilt, and with the non verbal visceral KNOWLEDGE of the facts of the Cosmic Universal TRUTHS, related to and regarding our being a privileged sentient part of nature with relative Free Will, rather than our having been convinced, and THINKING that we're outside of, condemned and destined to oppose and conquer nature - blessed as we are with the stupendous potential to THINK clearly and to intentionally change our minds and behavior, and so on - way back when, before we the species was indoctrinated through mistakes, sometimes well meaning but ignorant misunderstandings and misinterpretations, as well as intentional deception employing distortions, confusion, psychological and physical FEAR, torture, killing and such, for the purpose of domination by the few -- it was a part of normal everyday life for people to acknowledge, appreciate, respect, experience and enjoy the invisible, to most, spiritual transcendental realms and dimensions.

            Now, most of this specie's energy and time are consumed and concerned with doubts, debates, arguments and wars related to whether or not there even IS a spiritual dimension, and if so, who, whom or which group was chosen by GOD as his favorites that HE loves better than ALL the rest, and on and on to who, whom or which group should be the privileged few to rule over the rest - at any and all cost - because they're the smartest and strongest, and therefore allowed to be in-sensitive, notorious, ruthless, viscous, cruel... and for whom "Anything goes" ...blah, blah, blah.

            "In India, Nepal, China and Japan, sexuality has long been regarded as both an art and a science worthy of detailed study and practice. Indeed, the Eastern view is that no learning is complete without a through knowledge of the sexual principles underlying all existence. Eastern metaphysical tradition makes use of the mystery of sexuality as a means to the transcendental experience of unity. The feeling of oneness, achieved during or following the sexual act, is the most universally accessible mystical experience...". [from SEXUAL SECRETS - The Alchemy of Ecstasy; written and illustrated by Nik Douglas and Penny Slinger].

            "In the Far East, sex has always been considered a spiritual as well as a physical union. Sex was natural, sex was communion, sex was sexy... The Taoist believe (and it seems as though most, if not all "pre-historic" and ancient cultures and groups understood and therefore knew) that life must be lived in harmony with nature. If a man wants to reach enlightenment, he must be careful not to waste his essence. Women, Taoist believe, are closer to nature than are men, and a man's chance of reaching the higher planes increases if he can gather a woman's essence and add it to his own.

            How do they go about this? By bringing the woman to frequent orgasm, thus capturing her juices..." [from the June '93 COSMOPOLITAN magazine article by Alexandra Penny]

            "The practice of Tantric yoga lets us bring an intensity of concentration to sex. In India, the Tantric religion, devoted to worship of the mother goddess, focuses on female energy and teaches that sexual union can be a way of communicating with the gods. Modern practitioners of Tantric yoga believe that making love is not two people taking separate satisfaction but a union in which the boundaries of the body are dissolved and two people become one (complete person)." [from THE TAO OF SEX by Howard S. Levy and Akira Isihara].

            "If you are willing to train for golf, tennis, or running, why not for love? If you think of the act of love as an art form - a kind of cosmic dance of awareness in which every nuance of your lovers body is important - you'll realize that it's not ejaculation that provides fulfillment but all that leads up to it... One must be able to go beyond the Western concept of orgasm." [from Richard M. Chin, M.D. of the East West Institute in New York City.] {NOTE: All editorial embellishments are mine, such as parenthesis, bold, italics and underlines.}

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